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The way to gauge any negative impact on your mother's health would be if it causes a flare-up of her condition -- at which point her doctor should be notified so he/she can put a stop to it. I understand they were years ago, when it was a part of her dowry, but in modern times I have heard of such a thing only in your column -- unless the family is rich and Daddy pays for everything.

** ** ** DEAR ABBY: Are parents of the bride required to foot the cost of the wedding (averaging over $25,000 in the U. I can't imagine asking my parents to pay for my wedding.

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